So, there's this theory that developed in my head while flying bike on my way to work sometimes last week, and I thought to share it with you.🤗

 It pops into my head that, every being should have standards, or let me say it is a natural phenomenon to have standards or SPEC as it is usually called. It's not like I don't know the definition of standard oh. Ah ahn, smoh standard lasan lasan.  
I'm sure you know about it too.  Now, let me explain it to you this way. 

Standard is like a control or focus button which set you apart, and which makes it easier for you to decide what you want. Standard would also not make you take nonsense from anybody or allow anyone to do you rubbish. Shoo get? 😉

It could either be permanently engraved in your subconscious mind, which is as a result of values you grew up with, or experiences you have had, or you keep shoving it in our face, yeah, choke us😒, and this of course leads to expectations.

For instance, your dream is to get a 9-5 job, that's your standard, so you may likely not want to be an entrepreneur or anything less. That's your expectation. Or let's say, you'd like a TDH( tall, dark and handsome) guy,  and when a fair and short guy comes your way, you go tell am to shift. 😹💔 
You get the theory now? Now, let's move to the main thing. 

As much as standards act as a drive or control gear, making it easier to tick and get your goals, we sometimes end up setting ourselves up for unrealistic standards. Some expectations are just unrealistic. There's no argument on that.
Taking the present world and country into consideration, there are certain things which can't possibly work out with that thing you have in your head.

Take for instance, you can say you'd graduate in EXACTLY fours year from the University. No, not like this is not possible, but the chances of this happening as you wish is slim. You have to give credit to ASUU strike, give a slot to Lucifer's kid brothers disguising as lecturers who may want to suffa you for refusing their advances. Unexpected carry-overs nko?

This is just one of many instances of things not going your way- I mean your expectations. 

Another issue with setting up unrealistic goals is that it makes you blind to the strength and perfection of others, because you already envisaged what you want in your mind. Now, seeing that the particular person lacks one or two of the expected attribute, you zero them out, hereby making you lose out on their other possible potentials. 

Why is this? The thing is that, there is a thin line between setting up your standard and setting up unrealistic standard. You may not know you are crossing the line until things doesn't start going your way. You may want to talk with a life coach or a consultant to know how to avoid overstepping your boundaries.

Another way to avoid possible depression of over-standard is to try to put yourself in other people's shoe- this is specially for people in a relationship. If you were to be the other person, won't it be unfair on your partner's part if they are expecting this much from you?

I pray we all find the peace we are looking for, and reduce the problem of the world by setting up realistic standards.

Post edit: this is not exactly how the idea was formed in my head, because I couldn't quickly put it down in words immediately I got down, but the message is still intact. 😁